Losing a battle...

...let's not lose the war. The Decider's top HIV/Aids adviser has told a conference in Australia that humanity is losing ground in the fight against the deadly virus as one person gets infected for every one that is put in therapy. Of course the best weapons available to fight the disease, wide availability and use of condoms and clean needles for drug addicts are not generally available outside of the west largely because Washington has decided that God says "no". Meanwhile people surprisingly keep having sex despite the President and his minions telling them to stop.

The things I don't know

Did you know that there was an official Roman Catholic patron saint of handgunners? I didn't until just a few moments ago.

I wonder if the St. Gabriel Possenti Society has plans to build an "Our Lady of the Glock" church in Philadelphia. I'm sure it would be a big hit!

In which Royal Dutch Shell agrees to talks with a geographic feature

Royal Dutch Shell has been ordered by an appeals court to stop exploratory drilling on Alaska's North Shore pending a hearing over a number of environmental issues. In response to the court order a Shell spokesperson said, and I quote, "we will comply with the court order and continue to welcome discussions with the North Slope". The conversation's likely to be pretty one sided don't you think?

Why satire is dead

Because satire and irony are no longer necessary, if indeed possible, when the Pentagon sends a 400,000 USD cheque to the Rand Corporation for a study as to how to re-brand Iraq à la ketchup, burgers and corn flakes. Yes - ketchup. Key quote:

The slow pour of Heinz ketchup once embodied the brand’s positioning of the ketchup as having a thick, rich consistency. Possibly reflecting a new societal focus on speed and efficiency, Heinz still maintains that its ketchup is "thick and rich", but the positioning now focuses more on its new upside-down squeeze packaging that is "always ready when you are".

I am now going to sit down, have a nice cuppa tea and weep.

If you want the complete Rand Corporation report (PDF) is available here.

The 'tache is back

The Sunday Times featured an interview with former interim US Ambassador to the United Nations John Bolton in which he asks the question that is on everyone's mind: "Does Britain really want to be Belgium?" (Note: if it means we will get fritessaus on our chips and moules frites in every pub then my answer is possibly!) As the blustery ex-"diplomat" puts it: "Do you want to be an independent country or a county in a big Europe?...If Britain wants to be subsumed into the European soup, the United States will have to react accordingly – and we will, make no mistake." I think when he used the term "independent country" he is using it in the obscure sense of "vassal to the United States".

I may have cheated a bit...

...when I took took this quiz because this is the result I got!

"Wait, I'm not a dictator!" you cry! Well lets look at the check list: Unelected? Check! Use wars and xenophobia to boost popularity? Check! Total control of the media so they never say a bad word against you? Check! Kill scores of innocent people to get what you want? Check! Do anything to get your hands on oil? Check! Inhumane treatment of prisoners? Check! Face it, you're a dictator, and no amount of gloss will hide that fact… or the fact you're a borderline retard who looks like a monkey! What tin-pot dictator are you? Take the "What Dictator am I?" test at PoisonedMinds.com

That Freedom Thing

In Thailand at the weekend a demonstration against the military government, that overthrew the elected and legitimate government last year (with barely a murmur of protest from the west) turned violent. Clashes broke out between the demonstrators and riot police who wished to disperse them and several people had to be hospitalised. Time to invade?

Texas League tragedy

Was the ghost of Owen Meany present when a minor league baseball coach was killed by a line drive in Arkansas on Sunday?

Meanwhile in the City of Brotherly Death...

...The carnage continues. And to prove that the US National Rifle Association is right one of the six was stabbed to death rather than shot to death.

In which Mitt Romney proves he hasn't read Adam Smith (and that he is also an idiot)

Yesterday Republican Presidential hopeful Mitt Romney took the incredibly bizarre position that his Democratic rival Senator Hillary Clinton is a closet communist. He clearly has read neither Smith nor Marx, or at least didn't understand them, nor listened to Ms. Clinton, the most right wing of the Democrats. Of Ms. Clinton he said:

"Hillary Clinton just gave a speech the other day about her view on the economy. She said we have been an on-your-own society. She said it’s time to get rid of that and replace that with shared responsibility and we’re-in-it-together society...That’s out with Adam Smith and in with Karl Marx."

I think it is time that you brushed up on your reading Mitt. A few Adam Smith starters for you.

As soon as the land of any country has all become private property, the landlords, like all other men, love to reap where they never sowed, and demand a rent even for its natural produce.

Labour was the first price, the original purchase - money that was paid for all things. It was not by gold or by silver, but by labour, that all wealth of the world was originally purchased.

No society can surely be flourishing and happy, of which the far greater part of the members are poor and miserable.

Virtue is more to be feared than vice, because its excesses are not subject to the regulation of conscience.

How selfish soever man may be supposed, there are evidently some principles in his nature, which interest him in the fortune of others, and render their happiness necessary to him, though he derives nothing from it, except the pleasure of seeing it.

So go ahead and read (or re-read) The Wealth of Nations; I am sure you know someone who could lend you a copy. But don't forget, and so many do, to read The Theory of Moral Sentiments as well.

I have a dream!

I am certain that once these phone companies, all run no doubt by committed "free market" capitalists, realise that a material part of their revenues come from anti-capitalist, market distorting government subsidies they will rush to return the funds to their rightful owners; the American taxpayer.

How do you spell O-B-F-U-S-C-A-T-E?

Watch and weep.

Meanwhile Down Under

It surely isn't possible that the Australian police tried to stitch up terrorist "suspect" Dr. Mohammed Haneef, is it? They don't really think that the sole remaining charge of "recklessly providing resources to a terrorist organisation", better known as giving a SIM card he couldn't use anymore to his cousin, is going to stick do they?

Go Russ Go!!!

My hero, Senator Russ Feingold (D - WI), plans to introduce a measure censuring the Decider(TM) for his conduct of the illegal invasion of Iraq, some of his illegal and unconstitutional surveillance programmes and generally being such a twat. He may also introduce similar resolutions against Vice President "I'm a Big" Dick Cheney and Attorney General Alberto "Gone-zo" Gonzales.

Keep up the good work.

What you gonna do about it?

If the New York Sun is to be believed, always a good question, the US is already launching direct strikes into Pakistan against "al Qaeda" probably without the explicit permission of the Pakistani government. A note to Ms. Townsend and others of her ilk - these guys do have the bomb and they are not going to give it up. If you destabilise President Pervez "The General" Musharraf you are really not going to like the replacement. Trust me.

Venezuelan worries

When he first came to power I had high hopes for Venezuela's President Hugo Chavez and still think that the leftward swing in Latin America is a significant barrier to American hegemony in the region but he is showing signs of megalomania and tinpot dictatorism (not a real word). It is worrisome for the people of Venezuela and Latin America as a whole.

A word to the wise

Anyone concerned about the situation in the Philippines between the military and the armed militant Moro Islamic Liberation Front who is desirous of doing an Internet search is hereby warned to use the group's full name rather than the groups initials "MILF" as you will find the results of the second search to be dramatically different than the first and not entirely useful as regards Philippine politics.

Whither Turkey?

The party of Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan won a resounding victory yesterday and substantially increased its share of the vote from its victory five years ago. But what does it mean in the long run? There are the EU accession talks and the status of Cyprus to consider. There are simmering tensions on the Turkey-Iraq border and the possibility of a Turkish military incursion into Iraqi Kurdistan can not be ruled out. The military still lurks in the background as a possible threat should Mr. Erdogan take steps to move away for the Turkey's cherished, by some at least, secularism. Time will tell of course but the prospects of military action against Iraq does greatly concern me and, I suspect, many others as well.

To dream the inpossible dream

In his comment piece in today's Guardian about the American presidential campaign Gary Younge reminds us that George W. Bush will be an aspirational figure for future generations and a symbol of the achievabality of the Great American Dream. In his words:

"[T]o gain a true sense of what is possible in America, one should look no further than Gonzales's boss. The C-student, former alcoholic and failed businessman who displays not a scintilla of charm, charisma or oratorical flair...If Bush can be president, then surely "anyone" can."

I herewith announce the commencement of my campaign for the Presidency in 2008. I shall spend the next few weeks attempting to remember all of my experiences with sex, drugs and rock and roll so there will be no surprises come election time.

I got them deep river blues

The weather gods continue to be unkind to Old Blighty as the rain comes down. Flooding is the order of the day up and down the country. I continue to thankful that I live on a hill. It can't be too long before Bromley becomes an island.

Trying to stay on topic the great Doc Watson with "Deep River Blues".

What's good for the goose

Who knew? It seems that not only can homosexuality be cured so can homophobia. I wonder who will be next to sign up? Pat Robertson would be a bold choice I reckon.

Gone-zo watch (day 123)

US Attorney General and Bush succubus Alberto "Gone-zo" Gonzales is scheduled to make the onerous trek up to Capitol Hill again this week to talk to his friends in Congress and see if there is anything he can remember. I kind of doubt it but them my friends to tend to point out that I am rather cynical.

Meanwhile former Deputy U.S. Attorney General James Comey has floated what I consider to be a rather brilliant idea. Comey who served from 2003 through 2005 under both Ashcroft and Gonzales thinks that Gone-zo should resign and Patrick Fitzgerald appointed Attorney General. Mr. Comey said that Fitzgerald "certainly is one of the very best federal prosecutors in America". I think this is a brilliant idea and has slightly worse odds of happening than me waking up in the morning to find myself tall!

(To be continued...)

For your Sunday listening pleasure

Bat for Lashes performing "Horse and I" from this year's Glastonbury Festival

My congratulations to the Islamic Republic of Iran

For not being attacked during the hours yesterday when "I'm a Big" Dick Cheney was Acting President of the United States.

Dear Captain Codpiece

I sincerely hope that you have paid for your colonoscopy out of your tax deductible health savings account because we wouldn't want the Federal government to get involved in the health care of any citizen; especially not yours.

If the government were involved you probably would have had to go to some shithole public hospital and would not have been able to have the procedure in comfort at your weekend retreat.

Sincerely,

Yank in London

Il Papa goes mad!

Can you believe that an important Man of God like the Roman Catholic Pope would actually call for an call for an end to all wars? What is the matter with the man? He had the gall to term them "useless slaughters". Does this include wars where there very well might have been "weapons of mass destruction" or even where oil is at stake? I'll bet all Americans are breathing a sigh of relief that we haven't got a Catholic President. Does this mean that the Crusades were evil? What about the US invasion of Grenada?

This could just put the damper on St. Tony's imminent conversion.

(Former) friends don't let (former) friends hang around

Vitter must go. And that's not me talking!

Senator Stranglove...

...or "How I Stopped Worrying and Learned How to Love the Filibuster. You would think that the Republicans didn't have a majority anymore or something.

(Not) aiding the enemy

It seems that if one is a corporation it is a lot easier to get off of a list of those who support terrorism than it is for a human being to do so. I wonder why that could be.

Thinking is so last year

French President Nicholas Sarkozy thinks he knows why France no longer rules the world. It is because they are thinking too much. Why can't they be more like the Yanks and act without thinking?