Dear Mr. Rodriguez

I don't really care what you think as far as I am concerned cheating and drug abuse is far worse than stalking. Surely it's time you grew up.

And I certainly hope that you plan to personally reimburse every young man or woman, under the age of 18 say, who bought one of your shirts (or shoes or whatever), under the false pretense that you were playing by the rules. Perhaps someone should initiate a class action suit.

1,000 reasons John McCain shouldn't (and probably won't) be President

Number 96: as you will note in the video below he seems to have developed 1,000 facial tics and other expressions; all of them unpleasant. If these are not the result of a nascent drug habit I would suggest he get out on the street and develop one! (I would recommend Seconal, Valium or Quaaludes.

"Running for the shelter of a mother's little helpful"

Despite record opium crops in Afghanistan, thanks to the Eternal Global War on Terra, there seems to be a shortage of heroin on Britain's streets and junkies are increasingly turning to diazepam (aka Valium) to get by. The question I want to know the answer to is "where the hell is all the opium going?". Have they found a way to turn into to Oxycontin to feedc to Rush Limbaugh or something?

"Hasta la vista Yanqui"

Clearly Ecuador is just begging to get invaded. How else to explain the country's incredibly irrational decision to evict the US military from its airbase at Manta?

As if their skunk wasn't strong enough already

The recent Dutch smoking ban means that ones now has to smoke one's cannabis full strength rather than cut it with tobacco. I don't suppose this is going to make it any easier to get out of the coffee shop.

Bush on blow

I must have missed this yesterday. One of the revelations in little Scotty's book is that apparently Captain Codpiece can't remember if he snorted coke at university.

"Heh. I snorted something. I thought it was coke but I was just a stupid rich kid. They probably ripped me off and I only did meth! Heh."

I must react to the drug different. I remember snorting coke it's the things I did afterwards that get fuzzy!

We are not alone!

It seems that the United States is not the only country where the government seems to take its marching orders from Big Pharma. It looks like Canada has the same problem. (Yes, before you ask, there is a similar, if smaller, problem in the UK as well.)

In which I reluctantly admit that Captain Codpiece is a genius

How else to explain the sequence of events that begins with Our Great Leader, instead of urging Americans to conserve energy, suggests that growing energy is this answers to fuel shortages and climate change. This then leads to rapidly rising food prices; they are also driven by increasing population and poor weather. The price of food skyrockets so rapidly that Afghan farmers switch from opium to wheat thereby solving both the problems of the narco-economy in Afghanistan and driving many addicts to give up their drugs! We still have to work out how these millions of ex-junkies will be able to afford to eat but I'm sure he has a plan for that up his sleeves!

Cannabis gets a B

Can someone remind what exactly the difference is between New Labour and Good Old Tories? As the government goes against the advice of its own drug advisers (and the Old Bill) and reclassifies cannabis as Class B the Conservatives and the right wing press cheer the move. Who's on my side these days?

Headline of the day

"Police and marijuana campaigners clash".

Personally I think it was just a mix up over the free doughnuts.

Headline of the day (and one you will probably never see in America)

"Police reject tougher action on cannabis"

Remember to always buy American!

Even when buying your crank. After all, buying an illegal drug from an illegal immigrant is more illegal than buying an illegal drug from a God-fearing American who cooked it up in his own trailer.

"May he rest in peace hey wow my hand is melting"

Albert Hofmann - 1906 - 2008 - accidental discoverer of LSD- without whom the sixties would not have been the same.

Well where's the fun in that?

Boffins at the University of California believe they are close to finding a way to get at the medical benefits of marijuana without all those nasty side effects like making Cheech and Chong funny or making Tastykakes taste like they're not made from petroleum.

But how will we fill all of those private prisons?

US Representative Barney Frank (D - MA) has introduced a bill to decriminalise cannabis. Not that it's likely to get very far but it is the thought that counts, eh?

Did I forget to mention that the bill is being co-sponsored by some bloke named Ron Paul?

Not the Happy Pizza!

We must do something. Cambodia's Happy Pizza is under threat and we cannot stand idly by whilst this perpetual motion machine (eat pizza laced with pot - get munchies - eat more pizza laced with pot - repeat) is driven off the culinary map.

Note: remind me to tell you about the time I got trapped in my mate's house whilst his parents were away and we had nothing to eat but hash brownie.

Today in infamy - "it's been a long hard decade" edition

Ten years ago today Viagra was first marketed for erectile dysfunction and the world will never be the same.

At a loose end in Basel this weekend?

Well then take a little something and drop in on the first ever World Psychedelic Forum. It could prove interesting!

What are they going to use for money?

I you live in Jefferson Township NJ you may soon be reduced to making your purchases with rolls of quarters as a new and draconian anti-drug ordinance would ban anything that can be used to introduce "into the human body a controlled dangerous substance". That rules out bank notes and credit cards unless things have changed dramatically since my own misspent youth.

Bad news for homeopaths

Who needs the memory of water when the drinking water supply is full of prescription and non-prescription drugs? No one should worry of course because water supplies in the affected cities "insist their water is safe" and who wouldn't take their word for it? There's a map if you wonder if your city is affected.

If you're looking for a city to move to North Jersey looks a good bet as they are the only area reporting codeine in the water.