"Oh no! Don't think, even for a minute, that we're falling for this!"

In the state of Florida, which gave us the electoral cluster fuck in 2000 that saw Captain Codpiece usurp the presidency, there is a more afoot to split into two states; North Florida, known for its rusted pickup trucks and rednecks with two first names, and South Florida known for its rusted pickup trucks and rednecks with two first names. This is nothing but a craven attempt to get two more electoral votes and fuck us over yet again. In retaliation I think we should force the Spanish to take the whole bloody thing back, with the possible exception of the Keys (and their lovely limes).