"You're shit and you know you are"

In a closely fought away match environmental pressure group Greenpeace has defeated the British government. The match, played at the government's preferred venue of the High Court, turned on contested refereeing decisions. The men in black awarded Greenpeace a penalty, which they converted, after holding that the government had been "procedurally unfair" and that their play was seriously "seriously flawed". Interviewed after the match senior referee Justice Sullivan said that "something has gone clearly and radically wrong".

The members of the Greenpeace squad celebrated their victory afterwards at the near by Sunken Whaler pub with organic real ale and hydroponically raised skunk. The government side skulked away grumbling.